By Rory Scher, LMFT Thinking we can find lasting pleasure and avoid pain is what keeps us miserable, caught in a hopeless cycle of suffering–Pema Chödrön, When Things Fall Apart All of us on some level wish we could escape emotional pain. While we may not use these exact words, what many of us are saying is: I want to… Continue Reading »
Conflict Avoidance: Sink or Swim
By Lexy Ulrich, LPC When baby sea turtles are born, they begin their lives by struggling to get to shore by themselves. It’s a difficult time, and it’s possible that not all of them will make it. While it might seem easier for them to have been born closer to shore, this conflict at the beginning of their lives is… Continue Reading »
Pathological Altruism: When Giving Causes More Harm than Good
by Rory Scher, LMFT Giving and putting others first is heralded as a loving act, a way to show how much you care for another person, a way to relieve someone’s sadness, distress, or fear. However, did you know that there are times when giving can do more harm than good? In the clinical world this phenomenon is called “pathological… Continue Reading »
Getting Unstuck
By Felicity Dineen, LPC Have you ever had the thought, “I feel stuck”? If you haven’t, consider yourself lucky. This is a very familiar and common feeling for a lot of people. Whether it be in a relationship, a job, a city, or any other situation, feeling stuck can happen at any point in one’s life. Many times this feeling… Continue Reading »
How to Identify Passive-Aggressive Behavior
Most people who come to me for counseling—whether it’s for anxiety, depression, relationship concerns, substance abuse, or stress management—are on some level dealing with a shame issue, a pervasive or occasionally triggered sense of not being good enough. Shame is part of the human condition; we all have it to some one degree or another. When we’re ashamed, we tend… Continue Reading »
How to Ruin Your Relationship in Just 10 Easy Steps!
By Rory Scher, LMFT Use the words always and never and other discounting language to remind your partner they can never do anything right and don’t ever contribute. Similarly, point out only what your partner does wrong. This way they won’t get full of themselves or live under the illusion that they are succeeding at anything. Use the silent treatment…. Continue Reading »